The school counselor, Mr. Mackey, lectures Mr. Garrison\'s class on how drugs are bad . He passes around some marijuana so the kids will know how it smells, but the sample gets lost and the school fires Mr. Mackey. Meanwhile, Ike is going to have his Bris, but when the boys find out what that actually means, Kyle tries to save his little brother from the ceremony.
Picks up from Episode 113Who is Eric Cartman\'s father? Dr. Mephisto knows, and is just about to reveal the information when he is shot, and must be rushed to the hospital. America\'s Most Wanted comes to South Park and there is a big snowstorm, creating a tight situation. Meanwhile, Liane Cartman seeks help in high places to see if she can get a retroactive abortion.
The show starts off with the build up from last season\'s cliffhanger revolving around Cartman\'s paternal origins. However, just as it seems they are about to get on with the second half of \"Cartman\'s Mom Is A Dirty Slut,\" they do a 180 degree turn-around and reveal that for April Fool\'s Day they will be showing Terrance & Phillip in \"Not Without My Anus.\"
Jay Leno comes to South Park Elementary and faces ridicule over the size of his chin.
Cartman has been absent for school for some time, and the boys go to his house to find out what\'s wrong. Cartman has become depressed about not having a father. Cartman confronts his Mother about it, and she says that he was conceived at the 12th Annual Drunken Barn Dance. Meanwhile, Kyle and Stan enter a videotape they made of Cartman holding a tea party with stuffed animals in the weekly contest held by America’s Stupidest Home Videos.
Mr. Garrison takes his class on an archaeological dig for arrowheads. Cartman finds a mysterious triangle and the kids get on TV about this important discovery, which captures the attention of Leonard Maltin. He comes to South Park to warn about Barbra Streisand\'s desire to get the triangle. Barbra Streisand comes to South Park and tries to get the triangle from the kids. Barbra finally get the other triangle and becomes Mecha-Streisand, wreaking havoc upon the town. Maltin tells Chef to call Robert Smith of The Cure to come to the rescue.
Mr. Garrison decides to get a nose job. On the day of his operation, he gets Ms. Ellen to substitute for him. After the operation is complete, he discovers that he can have his dream career: hanging out and screwing hot chicks. Now Ms. Ellen is the new teacher, but that is OK because the boys all have a crush on her, especially Stan, which makes Wendy extremely jealous.
Eric is handing out invitations to his birthday party at school. Mr. Garrison informs them all that there is a new student joining the class. Announcing to all that he is Damien, the son of Satan. Even as Damien demonstrates his demonic powers the children are more loathsome than impressed
Kyle\'s mother complains that the Christmas play is favoring Christianity and not catering to people of other religions. Mean while Kyle is visited by Mr. Hankey the Christmas poo who only appears to Kyle. The complaints about the play continue, and all religious elements are removed from the play. Kyle is committed to a mental hospital because everyone thinks he\'s crazy for believing in Mr. Hankey. When Chef finds out about Kyle he makes everyone believe in Mr. Hankey, who appears finally to everybody.
The boys see a commercial with Sally Struthers about adopting Ethiopian children, and getting a sports watch. Instead of getting the watch, an actual Ethiopian child is sent to South Park. When the charity comes to pick up Starvin\' Marvin at Cartman\'s house, they take Cartman instead. In South Park, Mephesto creates a species of mutant turkeys that terrorize the town, and everybody enters a \"Braveheart\"-style war with the turkeys.